Crazy Love

"When you love someone, you'll do anything. You'll do all the crazy things that you can't explain."

I used to really like this song, and it popped into my head the other day. I was praying for my friends here, praying that God would change their hearts and open their eyes. Praying Romans 8:21, that they would be liberated from bondage and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. I love these people. I want to see them live free and satisfied, with passion and purpose. I love them so much it hurts.

When I came here almost two years ago, I was hoping to like the place, enjoy the work, make some good friends, and see God work in miraculous ways. I wasn't expecting to fall in love with a group of people. I wasn't expecting God to change my heart in the way he has. I wasn't expecting to learn more than I could ever teach anyone. And I definitely wasn't expecting this crazy love.

Why is it crazy? It's crazy because it's completely opposite of the kind of love I am used to. I am used to loving my family. They are easy to love. They loved me first. They treat me great. They do all kinds of things for me. I love God. He is easy to love. He loved me first. He takes care of me. He has given me life and all good things. That kind of love is normal and natural.

This love is crazy because most of these people are never going to love me back. They can't love me back. They don't even know what love is. Most of these people will never have any idea that I live for the opportunity to share with them how they can have life. If they did, most would think I am nuts. Maybe I am. Or maybe it's the rest of the world that is nuts. Maybe that thing we have been calling love for so long really isn't love. Maybe this crazy love is the real thing. I am starting to think it is.

Romans 5:8 says God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. That's how God demonstrates love. That's crazy. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us to demonstrate God's love. He died for a bunch of people who didn't love him back. He died for a bunch of people that didn't even understand him. He gave his life for a bunch of sinners like you and me. That's love. That's crazy love. That's the kind of love I am just starting to learn about.

I know I can't love these students quite like God loves me, but I'm going to try. And everytime I am misunderstood, or rejected, or heartbroken, I am going to remember our example, Jesus, who gave his life in the ultimate demonstration of crazy love. That's the only kind of love God has, the crazy kind. Maybe we could be a little crazier.

The cube

3 a.m. on a random tuesday. I just got off the phone with an old friend. When I say old, I'm talking I haven't conversed with this guy in maybe 15 years. We had a lot of catching up to do. Our paths haven't crossed in quite some time, but it's amazing how similar they have been. It's awesome how God brings people into our lives at certain times, and how he uses situations that we have experienced to connect us with others on this same journey. I have been thinking about it, and its like life is a giant rubik's cube. We are each sitting on a little colored square, wondering why we keep spinning and shifting, seemingly with no rhyme or reason at times. We have no idea what's going on on the other side of the cube, or that in just a moment we will be on that other side. Or maybe the other side will be next to us. The thing is, things often looked jumbled up and out of place, but there's one who knows the steps. He is working the solution, and sooner than we think, all will be righted in this twisted world.

We have a God who is sovereign over screwups like me. He is going to twist my world, and sometimes it will seem upside down, but through it all I know he is putting everything in line, in its proper place and time. It makes me smile. It makes me cry. It gives me hope. I gives me joy. So I will keep on dancing on my little square. Come dance with me.

Jack Ryan (June 5, 1918 - September 11, 2007)

Philippeans 1:21 - For me to live is Christ and to die is gain.

Tonight I celebrate the life of my grandfather, Jack Ryan, who passed away early this afternoon at the age of 89. While Grandpa Jack will be greatly missed by all who knew and loved him, I rejoice that he is now with Jesus. Grandpa Jack is now experiencing the truth of Philippeans 1:21, that for those of us who know and love Christ, death truly is gain.

Grandpa Jack had been in deteriorating health lately, and had most recently been admitted to the hospital last week with difficulty breathing. He was alert when he left this earth, actually he was in the middle of a sentence. The nurse who was attending him at the time told my parents that he looked at her and his last words were, "I feel..." He then closed his eyes and was gone.

I have been thinking a lot tonight about Grandpa Jack, and I can't help but think about how he might of completed that sentence. Grandpa Jack had been in a lot of pain recently. He is now in a place were he will never again feel pain. I imagine that he may have said "I feel....awesome!" Maybe he said "I feel.....brand new!" He could have said "I feel.....well, whole, clean!" Maybe he didn't finish that sentence. Maybe he was so overwhelmed as he entered the presence of Jesus that he couldn't utter a word. I don't know for sure, but one day I'll ask him. Until then, I will celebrate him.

Grandpa was a special man. He had a sharp mind, an incredible sense of humor, and he loved deeply and unashamedly. His passions were his wife Kay (my grandma), his family, and his Cincinnati Reds. He could spin a great story, and recounted events in great detail that happened nearly a century ago. Grandpa lived through so much history and experienced so many things. He was a warrior, who had overcome many hardships and obstacles yet continued to greet life with a smile and a laugh. I could sit with him for hours listening to his stories, his jokes, and his thoughts on baseball.

I talked to Grandpa four days ago. I had a feeling it might be the last time. I told him I loved him, and how special he was to me. I could hear his smile through the phone as he said the same thing he has always told me, "I love you boy. I am so proud of you." Thank you Grandpa Jack. Thank you for your love, and for always letting me know how you felt. Thank you for being such a special part of my life. I will miss you so much, but I am so glad that you are with Jesus. I can't wait to see you there.

Celebrate Life

Seven years ago tonight I woke up in the intensive care unit at Christ Hospital in Cincinnati, Ohio. My sister Le and I had both undergone surgery and she had given me one of her kidneys. The transplant was necessary because my kidneys didn't work anymore. They had failed and I required a new kidney. My sister loves me, and she did what was needed to give me a new life.

In the years since the transplant, a lot has changed. I used to think I was invincible. I now know I'm not. I view life as the precious gift that it is, and I live it a lot more fully. I've learned what's important, and I still continue to learn. I am not as strong or independent as I thought I was, but I am free. I am free to live as I was created to, glorifying God and deriving my satisfaction from Him alone.

I don't believe in coincidence. I know things happen for a reason. I can look back now at the transplant and see all the ways God has used that situation in my life. The more people I meet, the more I realize we all need a transplant. The thing we need is a new heart. The way we have been living doesn't work. God loves us and sees our need. He has done all that is necessary to give us a new life. We need to go to Christ's hospital and have a heart transplant. Then we can start living.

Today I went for a long run. I am training for my second marathon. I ran better today than I've run in a long time, maybe ever. For that I'd like to thank my sister. Today I lived a lot. I loved a lot of people. I lived with passion and purpose. It was one of the best days ever. For that I'd like to thank my God. I celebrate life today. Not merely the physical passing of time, but the state of being all that I was created to be. That's the only way to live, and we were meant to do it forever.

In John 17:3 Jesus tells us that eternal life is knowing God, and knowing him. That is the only kind of life that is worth living forever. Start living eternally today. It will give you reason to celebrate.

The best boy in the whole world

Today is the birthday of my oldest nephew, Walton. Happy Birthday Walton!

I am so proud of Walton. I am probably the proudest uncle in the world. Instead of just listing all of the things that make Walton so special, I am going to tell a few stories about him.

Walton loves to take care of peolpe. The other day, his Grandaddy was feeling sick. As Grandaddy left Walton's house, Walton ran out of the room, quickly returning with a bottle of Tylenol. Walton wanted to make sure that Grandaddy had medicine so that he could feel better.

Walton loves to play with trains. He is a trainiac! This was planned. Uncle Shua gave Walton a train on his very first Christmas. Now Walton's favorite trains are those from the Thomas the Train collection. Below is a picture of Gordon, Walton's favorite engine.



Walton is a great big brother. He has a little siter, Neva, and a little brother, Graham. Below is a picture of Walton, Neva, and Graham. Walton loves to teach Neva and Graham new things. Neva loves to try to do everything that Walton does. Sometimes she likes to say, "Walton can't do this" before performing some type of trick. She is a funny girl. Graham has a great example in his big brother Walton. I can't wait to see these two boys together as they grow older.



Walton is a hard worker. He is always helping his parents and grandparents with their projects. Walton loves to help his Daddy and is very skilled using tools. He can use a pressure washer, shop vac, cordless drill, and even helps his Mama vacuum the house. He also takes very good pictures with the camera. Walton took the picture below at Christmastime. Look how Neva is hiding.



Walton is becoming quite an athlete. He can run very fast and is also a good jumper and can hit a baseball pretty good. He is working on flying, which is a good quality for any developing superhero. Below is a picture of Walton practicing in the pool.



Walton is a very smart boy and is about to finish his first year of school. He is always learning knew things and pretty soon will be smarter than his Uncle Shua. One thing I know he will never forget is the first thing I taught him to say. I would say "Who loves you?" to which he would respond "SHUA!" I would then say "How much?" and Walton would say "Thiiiiiiiiiis much!" while spreading his arms out as wide as they go. I would then ask "How come?" and Walton would state the obvious fact, "Becaus I'm the best boy in the world!"



You are the best boy in the world, Walton. I love you so much and I miss you lots and lots. I am so pround of you and I can't wait to see you again. Have a wonderful birthday!

On the inside looking out

I could write for hours tonight, but I realize only my Mom would read it, and I also have a ton of homework to do and a test tomorrow. I just got back from having a talk with my friend Rebecca*. She is a freshman that reminds me way too much of another freshman I once knew.

Being a Christ-follower in today's world means we're often going to feel like outsiders (not in the S.E. Hinton classic sort of way). We are called to be different and many times it is painfully obvious just how different we are. Lately my heart has been continually broken as I meet more and more students who are searching for life and meaning and purpose, and I have realized that I am not on the outside; they are.

As followers of Christ we are insiders to the greatest love in the history of the world. We've got what everyone is searching for. Christ entrusted eleven men with spreading this to the world, and 2000 years later it's our calling and priviledge to continue to spread it. How do we do that? We love people. On the night before he was killed, Jesus told his disciples to love one another, and to love others as he has loved us.

Let's get back to Rebecca. She is searching for life, and for love, and she doesn't know where to look. Tonight I pointed her in the right direction. It may take a while, I pray not too long, but I want her on the inside, and so does God. I have hope for her, but what breaks my heart is knowing there are a half-million Rebeccas crying themselves to sleep tonight in my city, and 10 million more across Mexico. How many live in your town? How many do you talk to everyday?

We've been entrusted with a gift. We've been called to spread the love. Who do you need to love today? Who is your Rebecca? Open the door for someone on the outside. Shine the light. Show the love. There's plenty of room up in here.

*Names have been changed to protect the guilty

2007 Virtual Easter Egg Hunt

Happy Easter Everyone! I hope you are having a wonderful day celebrating the Resurrection of Jesus. May you believe that he is the Christ, the Son of God, and by believing have life in his name. (paraphrase of John 20:31)

Last year at this time an excellent tradition was started when Uncle Shua hid Easter Eggs at his apartment in Mexico, and Walton, Neva, and Graham searched for those same eggs, online from Kentucky. Here we have the second annual installment of Uncle Shua's Virtual Easter Egg Hunt.

The following pictures have eggs of various size and color hidden in different locations. There are some really big eggs for Graham to find, and some smaller eggs for Walton and Neva to find. There is even one picture with lots of eggs and Walton and Neva will need to count to see how many are there. (click on the picture to make it full-screen)

Happy Easter and enjoy the hunt! Uncle Shua loves you so much!

Picture 1 - The Couch
How many eggs are hidden in this picture? Graham, where is the big green egg? Walton, do you see the orange egg? Neva, which egg is bigger?



Picture 2 - The Door
How many eggs can you see on Shua's door? Neva, what color is the big egg? Graham, how many eggs are there? (Walton, can you help him?) Walton, what color is the smallest egg in the picture? Can anyone see anything else interesting on the door? Does Mama recognize the foto?



Picture 3 - The TV
Graham, do you see something big and yellow? It's an egg for you! Neva, can you find an egg? What color is it? Walton, I have a challenge for you! There are actually three eggs that you can see in this picture! Can you find the third egg? Where is it? What color is it? (Hint: Look at the TV screen.) Walton, you are so smart!



Picture 4 - Lot's of Eggs

Graham, how many eggs can you point to in this picture? You are such a smart boy! Neva, how many colors do you see? Which egg is the biggest? Which egg is the smallest? I love you Neva! You are my gorgeous genius! Walton, which color has the most eggs? Which egg is hiding the best?



Great job with the Egg Hunt! I hope that you all had fun! I wish I could be there with you to celebrate the day Jesus rose from the dead! Jesus loves you very much and your Uncle Shua loves you too! I love you Graham! I love you Neva! I love you Walton! Dios les guarde!

Uncle Shua