Jealousy

I have always hated to see people mess up. I am not one of those people that takes pleasure in other's mistakes. One reason that I became a missionary is because I wanted to talk to people about the way we spend our lives, and hopefully keep others from making some of the same mistakes I did. I want to tell people about God's plan for them, so that they don't take as long as I did to start living life as we are meant to live it.

That said, last week I faced a really difficult situation as I watched a good friend make some bad decisions. I found myself up late, late, late one night, praying over this friend, asking God to intervene. I found myself even becoming jealous of the way this friend was spending their time, wishing that they would wake up and see the light. As I walked the lonely streets outside my apartment at four o'clock in the morning, singing verses of Walkin' in Memphis (I don't know why) between desperate prayers for my friend, God started to work on my heart. He showed me that the way I felt about my friend is the same way He feels every time I forget Him and decide to spend my time on some lesser passion. I began to feel so convicted and like such a hypocrite. As I continued to pray for my friend, and as I finally rested, knowing they are in His hands, I began to think of all the late nights God has spent pacing the far reaches of the universe, wishing that I was making better decisions. I thought about all the times I have made Him jealous, because I have chosen weak and momentary pleasures over the all-surpassing joy of God and His love. I was so convicted thinking of all the times I have traded His glory for my own, or have chosen to bestow the worship that only He deserves on some cheap imitation.

I remembered the Bible saying that our God is a jealous God, so I knew that there were times where you can be jealous and still be holy. Deuteronomy 4:24 says, "For the Lord your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God." Exodus 34:14 says, "Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God." I think that's pretty clear.

Last week I think I felt like Paul must have felt in 2 Corinthians 11:2-3 when he said, "I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ." May we not be led astray. May we continue in a sincere and pure devotion to Christ, not being tempted to cheat on God.

Scripture, especially the Old Testament, makes it very clear that God takes our cheating very seriously. There are many references that compare us to adulterous people, guilty of infidelity against the one with whom we have made a covenant. While God's holiness requires a just punishment for our wretchedness, in His love he is like the perfect husband that is willing to take us back, IF we repent and decide to turn from our adulterous ways. May we all turn and return to the God who is love, who is holy, who is jealous for us, and who continually pursues us, even when we have turned our backs on Him. He is staying up late tonight, thinking about you, wishing you could only see, hoping that maybe tomorrow morning you will come and talk to Him, let Him love you, let Him fix you, let Him restore you to the person you were created to be.